AH-CHOO!

You can't truly understand what it is like to be a parent until you are one.  You can't truly understand what it is like to have a sick child until you have one.  And it's awful.  Just awful!  You feel helpless.  You don't understand why it has to happen to such a sweet, innocent little person.  You wish you could take the illness upon yourself.  You pray and pray.  In fact, I prayed 93 healing scriptures for Kaitlyn.  No significant results.  But in a few days, it passes.  She survived.  And I start to pray about it a little less.  Why don't I pray as much in the good times as in the tough times?  If God has really called me to be an intercessor, which I feel like he has, then what is wrong with me?  I'm thankful that it is not about performance.  But I also know that if I would "pray without ceasing" in all circumstances, I would start to see awesome things happen around me.  My faith would be built up.  Others who I pray for would be blessed.  It would so be worth the time invested.  When will I learn from my mistakes?

Yesterday, I listened to 2 one-hour videos by Beth Moore on Believing God.  My faith was so stirred!  I do believe God is real, but do I believe He can do all things?   Joshua 3:5 talks about walking into our promised land.  The #1 hindrance to doing so is unbelief.  She asked that we stand on the following statements:  1) God is who he says he is, 2) God can do what he says he can do, 3) I am who God says I am, 4) I can do all things in Christ, 5) God's word is alive and active in me.  These 5 statements make up the shield of faith.

When Kaitlyn was sick, I found myself questioning God's goodness.  Why would he let it happen?  Why didn't he choose to heal her quickly as I prayed?  I had the thought that he may not want to heal her- but that does not line up with the Word of God.

Here is the bottom line.  I know God.  I know that he is good.  I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that He loves me.  Jeremiah 29:11 says he wants to prosper me and not to harm me. The same goes for Kaitlyn.  I need to stop walking in passivity.  I am constantly reflecting who I believe God is.  I want it to be a positive reflection.  I want to stand in faith no matter the results.  Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God (Romans 10:17).  His word has to be immersed in me daily to build up my faith.  The word has to come in so that it will come out when other people need advice, prayer etc..

It's time to turn a corner in this journey.  It's time to walk out what I say that I believe.  I can't wait to see what God will do.